5 Things All Single Ladies Should be doing Right Now

This isn’t an exhausted list. Just a few things I believe ladies should be doing while they are still single. This is coming from a Pastor with a Biblical worldview. Hope and pray it’s helpful.

1. Grow in your relationship with Christ 

This means reading your Bible and spending time in prayer on a consistent basis. This also means getting involved in your Church. Your faith should always be number one in your in your life, now and forever. Seek first the Kingdom of God above everything else, including a relationship.

2. Be friends with other Godly women and Godly Couples 

Spend time with other Christians. Have female Christian friends, so you can help each other develop in your faith. And, I know, nobody likes riding 3rd wheel, but it’s important for single people to spend time with Godly couples, so they can see a Christ centered relationship at work.

3. Guard your heart 

Stop spending time with/dating boys. They will give you the attention you want and they can talk the talk, but it takes a real man, a Godly man, to actually treat, respect, and love you like you deserve to be. Be careful with who you date. Don’t settle and give your heart to a boy that doesn’t deserve it and don’t date without a purpose. Guard your heart and save yourself for marriage.

4. Respect yourself 

Respect and love yourself. You are worthy of a good man, but if you want to be respected by a man, then start dressing respectfully and acting in a way worth honoring. Stop putting your “goods” out there for everyone to see. You are worthy, because your identity is in Christ, not in the opinion of some guy.

5. Choose God’s standards over Hollywood’s 

Romance movies might be fun to watch, but they are not real! Stop using them as a standard to measure guys and your relationships. They give ladies unrealistic desires and expectations. A real man looks like Jesus, not Channing Tatum. Get to know Jesus better, so you will know what kind of man that you should be looking for as he pursues you. Looks and muscles will fade, but Christ never does.

Extra Thought:

I believe “Magic Mike” and “50 shades of Grey” are a version of “Porn for women.” This may not make me popular, but before you jump down my throat,  think about it. Porn, for guys, give men an unrealistic view of sex. It drives men to objectify women. Movies and books, like those mentioned above, do the same for women. They give ladies an unrealistic view of relationships and a false sense of manhood. You want a man to not judge you based on your body or looks, but then you flock to see these kind of movies. You can’t have it both ways. Be careful with what you watch and read, because they have long term effects on your life and your relationships. That’s true for men and women.

“Therefore I urge you, brethren, by the mercies of God, to present your bodies a living and holy sacrifice, acceptable to God, which is your spiritual service of worship. And do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind, so that you may prove what the will of God is, that which is good and acceptable and perfect.” Romans 12:1-2


  1. TJ Sewell · November 13, 2013

    Interesting Bro. Joel. This is my first time seeing your post and convey in the words that Lord has laid on your heart to spread. Look forward to reading more.

  2. joellaseter · November 13, 2013

    Thanks T.J. I appreciate it.

  3. Brandy · November 17, 2013

    I agree with you on the movies you mentioned being porn for women. I have refused to see them because of that fact. Great post!

  4. joellaseter · November 17, 2013

    Thank You.

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